A Man Should Choose His Principles Over His Desires
Modern men are drowning in distraction, seduced by instant gratification, and pulled away from the values that once made them strong. We live in a world that rewards comfort over character, convenience over discipline, and desire over principle.
Our fathers and grandfathers weren’t perfect—many came home hardened by war, emotionally distant, and rough around the edges—but they understood something most men today have forgotten: a man is measured not by what he wants, but by what he stands for.
Today, the battlefield is no longer fought with bullets, but with temptation, dopamine, and the quiet erosion of self-respect. A man can live to be a hundred years old in this modern world, yet never truly live at all if he abandons his principles.
This article is a call back to what truly defines a man:
clarity, discipline, values, and a code he can trust his life to.
If you’ve ever felt the pull between who you are and who you know you could be, this piece is for you.
The only true measure of success for a man..
Many men today are seduced by instant gratification.
They are softened by the conveniences of life.
Pulled off course by whatever “feels good” in the moment.
We’ve swung far from the stoic strength of our fathers and grandfathers.
Yes, they were emotionally absent at times.
Yes, war hardened them.
But they had one thing many modern men dont..
Principles.
A man today can live to 100 years old..
But a man without principles may never have truly lived at all.
On the surface, it can seem like a man is thriving when he indulges..
Women, cars, vacations, and all the beautiful distractions of the physical world..
The deeper questions for me is how is he on the inside?
Is he truly fulfilled?
Or left empty?
Does he know himself?
Does he trust himself?
Do others trust him?
And why should they?
There are many ways the world measures a man’s success.
Money. Status. Accomplishments. The things he owns. The pleasures he collects.
But none of these are true measures of a man.
Only God and the man himself can judge his success.
And in the end, I believe there is only one standard worth measuring:
Does he live by the values he claims to believe in?
That’s the only real scorecard.
Not wealth. Not achievements. But integrity
Lived, proven, embodied and earned.
In the modern world, a man must fight hard not to be swayed by temptation.
Not to break his own code.
A man’s code used to mean something..
In times of war, men knew that abandoning their principles could get them killed.
Today, the risks look different, but I’d argue the outcome is the same.
It won’t kill you physically.
You will just never truly live for yourself.
The modern genocide of man is not bloodshed, but brainwashing.
And most men’s minds are weak.
Many men are convinced to take the path of least resistance.
Mostly because they are afraid to hurt someone’s feelings.. or take on something difficult themselves.
I believe that a man steeped in values will go further in life than a man led by impulse.
Yet most men today inherit their beliefs from parents, religion, teachers, or even their wives.
They never stop to ask themself:
What do I value?
What are my principles?
And am I living by them?
These are the three questions I ask myself intentionally every year.
It’s been the greatest measure of success that I’ve found.
The Cost of Connection
Mankind is moving toward a more disconnected world than ever before.
Connection is becoming a commodity.
But right now, it’s invisible.
We don’t realize we’re paying for it with our attention, our nervous systems, and even our dollars.
We chase connection on screens.
We consume it through content.
And yet, the more we try to connect, the more disconnected we become.
So how do you measure connection?
Connection is like a nutrient for the soul.
How do you know if you’re getting enough of it?
When you’re not, you feel it—not as hunger, but as restlessness, numbness, or that quiet ache that something’s missing.
And when you finally get it—through real conversation, shared experience, or time in nature—something inside you remembers what’s real.
I’ve been trying to figure this out for myself:
first, how to measure connection,
and second, how to know when I’m getting enough.
Because connection isn’t about information; it’s about experience.
It’s not about knowing more, but about feeling more.
We don’t need more content.
We need more connection.
Man is moving toward a more disconnected world than ever before..
Connection is becoming a commodity.
But right now, you might not even know it’s happening.
You might not even realize that you are paying for it with your attention, your nervous system, and even your dollars.
Chasing connection through a screen..
Consuming content..
Trying to connect, but mistaking the menu for the meal leads us to more disconnection..
So how do you measure connection?
Connection is like a nutrient for your soul.
How do you know if you’re getting enough of it?
When you’re not getting enought, you feel it.. the hungry ghost. It shows up as restlessness, numbness, or a quiet ache that something’s missing.
And when you finally get it: a good conversation, an embodied experience, or time to reset in nature… something inside you remembers what real connection feels like.
I’ve spent a lot of time trying to figure out for myself when I’m filling my cup, or emptying it out.
How to measure connection, and ensure I’m getting enough of it.
What I’ve come to realize is that connection isn’t about more information; it’s about experience.
It’s not about knowing more, it’s about feeling more.
We don’t need more content.
We need more connection.
Share with a buddy.. 👇🏼
The Reset Most Men Never Give Themselves
The Reset Most Men Never Give Themselves
The reset your burnout really needs..
Most men won’t give themselves the reset they deserve..
Most men delay taking care of themselves until something forces them to..
Either a health scare or the fantasy of “one day, when I finally make it.”
There’s a difference between being tired and being burnt out..
Tiredness is solved with rest. A good sleep, a slow weekend, and you’re back.
Burnout runs much deeper.. it’s a numbness that no amount of sleep can fix.
A few decades ago, men weren’t burning out the way we do now.
Work was still hard, but life had texture; there was community, space, and purpose woven through the day.
Now we live in a world where everything hums at full speed, and the noise never really stops.
Mild burnout shows up as that quiet dull ache in the soul..
the loss of excitement and aliveness.
The sense that life has become one big to-do list. In its most severe form, burnout can crush a man.
I’ve seen it..
Relationships end, health scares, and in some cases, death.
In Japan, they have a word for it:
“karoshi.”
— It literally means death from overworking.
But you don’t have to die for burnout to be killing you..
Most men try to fix burnout by adding more: more money, a new car, another vacation.
I get it, I used to think the same.
For me, it was the Tesla.
I thought owning it would feel like freedom.
It didn’t.
It was high tech, sexy, fast…
But mostly just another screen to scroll.
The answer isn’t always more. Sometimes it’s less.
We’ve become a culture addicted to overstimulation..
A hit of dopamine from the screen, the ritualized upgrade to the newest iPhone, the vacation taken more for the photo than the experience.
We chase freedom while burying ourselves in mental debt, mistaking consumption for meaning.
Amongst all this noise, something has gone missing.
The man himself.
The more we add, the further we drift from our natural state.
The more we try to fill the void, the larger it grows.
Think about it like this: you’re cleaning the sink, but the drain’s clogged. The water keeps rising, so you scrub harder, more frantically. You forget the simplest move is to turn off the tap.
That’s what most men need to do..
Shut it off.
Step outside their current reality.
Spend time in quiet places that don’t need anything from you.
Let yourself be still long enough to remember what you actually feel.
Sometimes the most important work a man can do is step away for a while.
Solitude is the solution. The silence reconnects the man to himself.
So the real question isn’t can you reset..?
It’s will you give yourself permission to?
Share with a buddy.. 👇🏼
Why Men Need to Spend Time Away From Women To Be With Other Men
Why Men Need to Spend Time Away From Women To Be With Other Men
We’ve grown adept at living in a modern world where women are everywhere men are. In the workplace, in the home, often in the car, and definitely in the social media we consume.
At face value, it seems harmless. Some would even argue it’s good for the world.
But there is something profoundly wrong about this way of living, and it’s eroding the very foundation of masculinity that our civilization was built on.
For all of history, men have spent time away from women to be alone with their fellow men. It’s more than tradition or “men’s groups.” It’s a primordial calling we must not ignore. We are not designed to spend as much time as we currently do with women. We have been intelligently designed to march shoulder to shoulder with our brothers as we go off to war, or to support each other hand in hand as we hunt and fish. We are meant to share hardship and triumph around a fire. This is literally how we are built. We are the heavy lifters, the hunters, and the protectors of society.
But many men in the modern world have lost this. They’ve become overly soft, disconnected from their natural edge. That’s what happens when we blend men and women together without honoring their differences. Iron sharpens iron, and strong men sharpen other men. That’s one of the beauties of being with a group of only men. We call each other forward. We don’t let each other fall short. We test one another and hold each other accountable.
This is especially true in nature, where keeping your brother strong can mean keeping yourself alive.
Imagine defending your camp from a hungry grizzly bear, hanging off the side of a mountain while being belayed, or paddling through fast-moving rapids with a partner. You want to know you can count on your brother when the adrenaline is pumping and it really matters. Ironically, these dangerous moments are the ones that make us feel most alive.
Most modern men are missing that feeling, the feeling of aliveness, because they’re so deeply entangled in the world of the feminine.
The craziest part is that even though so many men spend their lives trying to please the feminine, they’re miserable.
Think about it. From the beginning, we learned to please our mothers. Then came feminine babysitters and teachers. We were taught not to upset them, not to rock the boat, not to be “too boyish.” And most of us ended up with feminine partners who reinforce the same patterns. No wonder so many men are frustrated; they’ve spent their whole lives being told not to be who they are.
They’ve been missing a certain energy, one that only comes from being with other men. You can’t find it in the modern world.
If you’ve ever played on a men’s sports team or sat in a men’s circle, you’ve felt it. It’s hard to describe, but it shows up as a raw, electric permission to be “too much.” You can be, do, say, or feel whatever you want, and it’s welcomed and celebrated.
That energy is medicine. In its absence, men feel constricted, frustrated, and often take it out on their feminine partners.
And let’s face it, some things are simply inappropriate in the presence of the feminine. That’s why men need time away with other men—to clear it out, to reconnect, to reset.
I guide groups of men out into the wilderness. When they return, they carry a felt sense of freedom back into their homes, their communities, and the rest of their lives.
If you’re a man, I highly recommend finding time for men-only activities.
If you’d like to join us on a Men’s Adventure Retreat, visit mensadventureretreat.com or find us on Instagram @mens.adventure.retreat.
We’ve grown adept at living in a modern world where women are everywhere men are..
In the workplace, in the home, often in the car, and definitely in the social media we consume.
At face value, it seems harmless. Some would even argue it’s good for the world..
But there is something profoundly troubling about this way of living..
I believe it’s eroding the very foundation of masculinity that our civilization was built on.
For all of history, men have spent time away from women to be alone with their fellow men..
It’s more than tradition or “men’s groups.”
It’s a primordial calling we must not ignore.
We are not designed to spend as much time as we currently do with women..
We have been intelligently designed to march shoulder to shoulder with our brothers as we go off to war, or to support each other hand in hand as we hunt and fish.
We are meant to share hardship and triumph around a fire.
This is literally how we are built..
We are the heavy lifters, the hunters, and the protectors of society.
But many men in the modern world have lost this.
They’ve become overly soft, disconnected from their natural edge.
That’s what happens when we blend men and women together without honoring their differences.
Iron sharpens iron, and strong men sharpen other men.
That’s one of the beauties of being with a group of only men.
We call each other forward..
We don’t let each other fall short..
We test and hold each other accountable.
This is especially true in nature, where keeping your brother strong can mean keeping yourself alive.
Imagine defending your camp from a hungry grizzly bear, hanging off the side of a mountain while being belayed, or paddling through fast-moving rapids with a partner..
You want to know you can count on your brother when the adrenaline is pumping and it really matters.
Ironically, these dangerous moments are the ones that make us feel most alive.
Most modern men are missing that feeling, the feeling of aliveness, because they’re so deeply entangled in the world of the feminine.
The craziest part is that even though so many men spend their lives trying to please the feminine, they’re miserable.
Think about it:
From the beginning, we learned to please our mothers as we were sucking her tits.
Then came feminine babysitters and teachers. We were taught not to upset them, not to rock the boat, not to be “too boyish.”
And most of us ended up with feminine partners who reinforce the same patterns..
No wonder so many men are frustrated; they’ve spent their whole lives being told not to be who they are.
Men have been missing a certain energy in their lives.
An energy that only comes from being with other men..
You can’t find it in the modern feminine world..
If you’ve ever played on a men’s sports team or sat in a men’s circle, you’ve felt it.
It’s hard to describe, but it shows up as permission to be who you truly are without ever being “too much.”
You can be, do, say, or feel whatever you want, and it’s welcomed and celebrated.
That energy is medicine.
Without it, men feel constricted, frustrated, and often take it out on their feminine partners.
And let’s face it, some things are simply inappropriate in the presence of the feminine..
That’s why men need time away with other men.
To clear it out of their system, to reconnect and reset themself.
I guide groups of men out into the wilderness..
When they return, they carry a felt sense of freedom back into their homes.
Their whole community is better because that man is better kept.
If you’re a man, I highly recommend finding time for men-only activities.
If you’d like to join us on a Men’s Adventure Retreat, visit mensadventureretreat.com or find us on Instagram @mens.adventure.retreat.